Eyes Never Dry.

Marvelous! The vocabulary used in this poem was extensive and expanded throughout. I loved the word usage. This poem seems to be one of heartache. It holds such pain and loneliness. The person suffer's from a loss. I can sense the pain that she feels. You depicted that perfectly.

"Pouring like burning lava with no extent;
streaks of crimson left as residue,
on her cheeks; perpetual. "

That was a feat. It described her tears and her hurt. The sorrow bled out of her through her tears. I understood that. It was very beautiful. I love how you used metaphors but not so openly. The reader has to truly read this to recall what the truth behind this piece is. I thoroughly enjoyed the rhythm and flow. They intertwined and caused a "volcano" of words to spew forth. Very nicely done Temps.

5/5

-FeignOctober

Azul eyes dim to slate gray,

Azul is blue in Spanish. I find it random to just insert a word of another language. You could have used another English word to describe blue...

fog blinds vision, a storm of tears arrives.
Pouring like burning lava with no extent;

If your tears burnt like lava I think it would be a most extreme extent....

streaks of crimson left as residue,
on her cheeks; perpetual.

My interpretation of this is that the tears burnt her cheeks now they are bleeding forever.....

Sorrow barricades muffled happiness,
hidden deep beneath hopeless eyes...
as memories make a distinct appearance,
shattering like shards within her mind,
none worthy of remembrance.

Deep emotion here. Nice word choice.

Stormy eyes rage on, raining tears
for eternity, flooding her aimless life.

I know it is difficult when you are given a title and then have to write a poem. I agree with Valedico's critique. I think with a little editing the poem could be much better.

Your title went cliche Temps..for such a good poem, the title definitely doesn't deserve it.But I can't say nothing, it's a contest anyway.

"fog blinds vision as a storm of tears arrives."
^Would suggest you replace the "as" with a comma, gives more ambiguity to the poem and lets the reader sink in within the meanings.
Always try as much as you can to remove your fillers.

Well done Temps =)
Write on~

Very well done. Have to say the last two lines are the best for me. Stormy eyes raining tears, if you cry hard enough tears are like rain, a vivid image with those words. Good job.

Your punctuation and understanding of the English language is improving though, sorry I was gonna add that onto my other comment but I forgot. :)