Click Clack

by silvershoes   Jun 23, 2010


Click clack went the horse down the cragged pavement
Click clack went the horse, unhinged enslavement

With his rod iron shoes and his flanks blue with bruise
With his muzzle bled red and his eyes glued ahead

Click clack went the horse across the dry dusty road
Click clack went the horse, if but to lighten his load

With his spirit laid broken and a bell as his token
With his withers sweat-soaked and the sun of hope cloaked

Click clack went the horse through the mud and the muck
Click clack went the horse, whip-snapped dare he buck

With his pride tucked by fear and his reprimand severe
With his herd nigh forgotten and his bitterness long rotten

Click clack went the horse shut away in his stall
Click clack went the horse, his former self lost to all

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Latest Comments

  • 13 years ago

    by Sunshine

    Oh and congrats for wining this.. WEll DESErved

  • 13 years ago

    by Sunshine

    I can be the horse in this poem actually..am so happy that I can see this poem in so many different.related ways and diff angels..!!

    but let me tell u ..this rhyme scheme is one of the most perfect ive ever read...u even had words rhyming in the same line ! how poetic that is..

    i almost can sing this poem..
    ur realy one of the most unique poets..and this poem just proves my previous comment to be right,..which is how much u put in ur poems

    i bet u write by heart and mind..not by had.
    amazingly penned..
    and this
    With his pride tucked by fear and his reprimand severe
    With his herd nigh forgotten and his bitterness long rotten
    .........................left me out of words

    5/5!

  • 13 years ago

    by Minkus

    Good job. I agree with what a lot of the other commenters have said, including the parallel to the reader's own situation. I enjoyed the dynamic rhyme scheme, changing from stanza to stanza and flowing without a hitch. Not "clop clop," but "click clack"--such a harsh sound, helping to communicate the unpleasantry of the situation. Great write.

  • 13 years ago

    by Sylvia

    Very creative and glad that I stopped to read it. At first glance I was put off by the repeating words and lines but putting that aside it is creative and does force the reader to think. For that alone it deserved the win. Well done.

  • 13 years ago

    by Anthony M

    I'm glad that this poem won the weekly contest as that's how I came across this unique write that immediately places the reader not only into the horse's plight but also immerses the reader in contemplative thought about the obvious parallel with people in the horse's role.
    Talented write, I'll have to read more of your poems.

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