Bad habit

by Biancas Veil   Dec 9, 2012


My head spinning
Thoughts getting fuzzy
I'm doing it to myself again
One day I will stop it but when

Getting loose
Not even caring
I had dropped a bad habit
Thought that I would celebrate a bit

Another habit
Not known at that time
Traded one for another
Why did I even bother

Now all I want to know is one thing
How do I stop drinking

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Latest Comments

  • 11 years ago

    by onethuscome

    Best line at the end.the honesty;a bee line right to the heart of the matter.THAT'S the kind of thing that grabs my attention."how do i stop drinking?"BOOM!!... that's what i hear

  • 11 years ago

    by zombiepikachu

    I really do like how deep and truthful this is.
    A couple of notes:
    - habits is spelled with one B.
    - be aware of how you end a stanza. It'll be what we remember most. So I suggest ending the first stanza with something other than "but when" because it strikes me as odd.
    - show don't tell. I know we hear this a lot. But i think it would be a lot stronger if you don't tell us what the new bad habit that is picked up, is. Purpose talk about quenching your thirst.

    On a side note, I'm saddened when I read this. So good job at conveying the emotion intended. C:

    • 11 years ago

      by Biancas Veil

      Thank you and I will keep that in mind.
      I'll also fix my spelling:)

  • 11 years ago

    by Wisdom Kanyone

    Wow what a nice poem. Sweet soliloquy.

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