Comments : Write me a Poem

  • 11 months ago

    by mossgirl19

    Trying something new. Did I just post this? :-)

    • 11 months ago

      by Ren

      YOU SURE DID! ;) Dearest Lady...what a pleasant surprise!

  • 11 months ago

    by Maher

    This is well written as well as being kept craftily innocent. Definitely not something I'd expect to come from you - talking about the whole 'leaky pen' thing. But 'tis a very good write :)

    P.S: A lid may help :p

    • 11 months ago

      by mossgirl19

      Haha, I tried my very best to keep this innocent, believe me. Thanks, Maher. :-)

      P.S. You can't write with a pen with the lid still on.

    • 11 months ago

      by Ren

      hahahaaaa.... <3

    • 11 months ago

      by Maher

      LOL bugger me, she got me there haha

    • 11 months ago

      by mossgirl19

      Hahaha. You two!

  • 11 months ago

    by Ren

    I agree, this is definitely something I wasn't expecting to see from you...BUT AM SO GLAD I DID! This is excellent, Mel Liz!! Trying something new, indeed! You did an awesome job! Love it!!

    • 11 months ago

      by mossgirl19

      Thank you so very much, dear Cowgirl! Glad that you loved it. Imagine my fears. Haha. Your support is really awesome!

  • 11 months ago

    by Em

    Emotional wreck over here

  • 11 months ago

    by k.won

    the imagery is blinding me. Good work.

  • 11 months ago

    by Michael

    Oh my Miss M pen-inked ectasy :)
    What a fantastic poem. I really like this.
    'Engrave it deeply, love
    impress me'

    Love this line and well written

    Michael :)

    • 11 months ago

      by mossgirl19

      Thank you, Michael for the lovely words!

  • 11 months ago

    by Augustus Black

    A really amazing flow of loving nature. Probably one day someone special will come to you and will write a fanciful poem for you. Waiting is a bliss.

    A very nice work here. Mel.

    • 11 months ago

      by mossgirl19

      Wow, thank you, Augustus. What a nice comment!

  • 10 months ago

    by Bradley Peter

    This is a lovely piece. Very enjoyable. I fear this is going to possibly be perceived as a backhanded compliment, but I think you particularly shine in poems without rhyme. This is full of power and beauty. It is subtle and sensual. There was a wonderful calmness to this piece. A stillness. I instantly began reading it at a slower pace, and I think I'm the happier for it. I particularly thought the second stanza was splendid.

    I usually like to give some kind of constructive feedback as well as praise, but in this there is very little for me to say, other than I would've liked one more line in the second to last stanza, but I'm sure there's a specific reason as to why you gave it only two.

    Great piece.

    • 10 months ago

      by mossgirl19

      Thank you, Brad. It's meant to be read at a slow pace I think, for it to be truly appreciated. I meant that particular stanza to be an emphasis to what is already happening...so two lines only just to make it more sensual...:-) Thanks for checking this out.

  • 9 months ago

    by hiraeth

    Bradley said it best, you can't help but read this at a slow pace, and being able to make the reader do that instantly, is a testament to your writing skills. There isn't much to be said, other than the fact that you nailed this poem, though being tight-lipped (this poem isn't dripping with details) it's still gets its point across. (totally didn't mean for that sentence to be a double-entendre lol). Well done!

  • 9 months ago

    by Milo

    I love that you controlled the speed and rhythem at which the poem is conveyed, like slowing time down just enough to witness the subtle strikes of ink onto the body, and you did it with ease. I'll pm you the rest of what I think.

  • 9 months ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Well, well Mel. I will pm you my thoughts...

  • 9 months ago

    by Brenda

    Lady Mel, I think.it just got really warm in here....you said so much without being explicit and that is the magic of writing. Well done!

  • 9 months ago

    by - Mr. Darcy

    I like the metaphor here. Writing a poem, a love poem is rather like making love. If your heart is not feeling it, the result is evident.

    I like the way the verses efficiently deliver this love. I had to smirk at the end. :)

    Is the poem perfect? Well, it could be tweaked, added to, but I think this is unecessary. It would be interesting to write it with rhyme, or squeeze it into a strict form. Would it improve, probably not?

    Well done. ((Hugs))

  • 8 months ago

    by .k.u.s.h.q.u.e.e.n.c.j.

    This is truly breathtaking how much you show your true feelings with saying so little. This is excelllence & once again, an amazing, very inspirational write.