Too Late..

Should I hold back tonight,
Even though it's not my time to go?
I was given life.
This is something everyone should know...

I'll just sit it out and cry.
Till it all goes away.
Till my body is ready to die.
Till my heart is ready to stay.

But then it will be too late.
Just like everything is.
Now it's too late to debate.
On what this really is.

Why can't this be a joke?
why can't this be a prank?
Why don't you just sit up and laugh?
And tell me that you're okay?

But it is not.
and you will never move again.
You'll lay in a grave and rot.
I guess I'll meet you in the end.

We'll lay side by side.
Then I'll tell you how I feel..
You didn't hear me before.
So hopefully tonight we will both be real...

Maybe we can hold hands.
Maybe you'll look me in the eyes.
Maybe, you'll get up and stand.
To dry those tears that I have cried...

You have won the race.
You beat me to my grave.
You made it there before me.
And then you took my reasons away.

At first I wanted to help others.
To maybe save a life.
To dry all my readers tears.
But right now I am holding the knife.

Forget it, i'll just drop it again.
I keep on forgetting.
That it isn't my friend.

I don't even know right now.
I guess I'll just move on.
I guess I'll dry my own tears.
I guess I'll just be strong..

I will aid the need of kids.
They need me now more than you.
I will help those who are emotionally blind.
This whole incident I won't review.

I'll let this one go, Dad.
I know its not your fault.
I LOVE YOU SO SO SO SO SO MUCH.
My love for you can't be bought.

Well you never got my message.
You signed off before I got on.
You got the one about my hatred.
But after that you were gone.

It was too late to tell,
How much i love you.
So I continue to write to no one.
Hoping you'll respond soon....

My last message...."I LOVE YOU".
Has been sitting there for days
It says you may not respond,
And you never heard what I had to say....

Well I'll say it again dad,
I'll write it in the sky.
Life wouldn't be as bad.
If you wouldn't have died...

Well once again.
There's traffic in this empty lane...
Well I love you dad, my friend....
But now I will wash away all this pain....

This was hard to write, so if you could, please comment on. I had so many emotions, i couldn't think straight so it may be difficult to understand......thanx...