Comments : My Worse Fear.

  • 11 years ago

    by Kristina

    Very sad poem you have written. i love the worlds you used in it. some of the rhyming isnt all that good, but i can see you tried. great job 5/5

    ~Kristina

  • 11 years ago

    by monika

    Nice poem :)

  • 11 years ago

    by jessica

    This is how i feel when me and my friends fight. but we fight all the time , me and my frien are fighting right now and i have no clue why!!! but your poem is GREAT!

  • 11 years ago

    by BooBa

    Aww i rrly like ur poem! keep writing and maybe read some of mine;)

  • 11 years ago

    by shay

    Wow speechless, great poem, *shay*

  • 11 years ago

    by isa

    Hi, this was a gret poem u explain how u feel, the truth can be really scary, well thats all great poem bye!

  • 11 years ago

    by ForeverGoneInYourEyes

    Hit me right here

  • 11 years ago

    by BeautifulxMess

    Thank you so much everyone!

  • 11 years ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    Before I even do an official comment on this poem, I can't help but be annoyed by the title:
    *My Worse Fear*

    Please change it to

    *My Worst Fear*

    (now off to read the poem)

  • 11 years ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    (Oh, and a sidenote: Don't put periods at the end of your titles. It makes the title ugly as well)

    I feel like I'm going to hit the floor. = I Feel Like I Will Hit the Floor

    No body sees whats wrong with me. = No one sees what's wrong with me

    And now I can't say on my two feet. = And now I can't STAY on two feet.

    Forgive me for I know I failed.= forgive me, for I know I've failed

    Friendship doesn't last a life time. = doesn't? Wrong useage of the word...

    Friendship ends; Maybe just mine. = friendshipS end

    I just hope that they'll come around = I just hope that they'll come around.

    I got to give in. = I must give in

    Give in my secrets I hold within. = give up the secrets that I hold within

    For a minute a cut's pain will hurt. = for ONLY a minute a cut's pain will hurt

    This pain stays, and feels like dirt. = But this pain is staying, it's stuck and alert (or something along the line)

    Just leave me on the floor. = just leave me *laying* on the floor

    just cry and drown in my tears= only cry and drown in tears

    Who knew I drug all these years. = Who knew I *drug*?

    "*I'll fight my fears on my own.
    I'm not going to be all alone."
    *That couplet is too much of a contradiction*

    Let me be you've done enough. = Let me be, you've done enough.

    I can't believe you just shut up. = I can't believe you; just SHUT UP.

    Get out my face I can't look at you= Get out my face cause I can't look at you

    But now, my worse fear is the truth. = But now, my worst fear is the truth...

    The poem was too... sketchy, I didn't particularly enjoy it as much as I know that I should have. I suppose there were too many errors.
    Still, you made me think of a poem I wrote a while ago, and the poetry is half on structure, and half on whether or not it comes from the heart. All errors besides, this did come from the heart.

    Well written dear,
    Hope you're over the loneliness now that you have a boyfriend!
    5/5
    ~Stephen White