When i was growing up

When I was growing up
I was on the outside
I followed like an obsessed pup
But always missed the laughing tides

When I was grown up
I turned towards the outside
Still I was Left panting like a pup
For the sea took away the pride

I caught the new tide
But when my paddling stilled
My heart caught frost and died
For the laughter finally chilled

I tasted it once
i touched it twice
But never did I get to experience
The sensation of my seniors presence.