Nice. Very, very nice. I liked it a lot. A unique twist on something well known is always enjoyable, especially when written well, as you've done. The first and third stanzas were my favorites, but I can't choose one of over the other i'm afraid, sorry. My favorite lines were 'Makes my butt look like a barge' and 'I'll have awesome skinny legs', the addition of 'butt' and 'awesome' really made the character more real, and gave them a bit of an edge. Great piece, as I said, I really liked it.