Comments : The Lid Of Doom

  • 10 years ago

    by Rachel RTVW

    Your poem flows well . Deep and meaningful and an excellent use of metaphors.

  • 10 years ago

    by debbylyn

    Love the metephors and the use of repetition in the lines....throughout a thread of longing...

    Great imagery and flow. Love the nature references and the contrasting components of night and light!

  • 10 years ago

    by Lonely Rider

    Wonderful write... beautiful flow..

    "Though I am the knight
    Of rays and shades
    My noon is night
    And longs to light"

    ^^ very touching... 'My noon is night'.. loved it...

    "Though I am the eagle
    Of haze and sky
    My birds are crippled
    And long to fly"

    ^^ beautiful imagery.. I felt as if i have been bound to something.. I can walk but not able to... wonderfully writen..

    'Though I am the depth
    Of sunset and dawn
    My night is floating
    And longs to drown'

    ^^ again.. amazing...

    Excellent write...

    keep writing..

  • 10 years ago

    by End Of Eternity

    Wow Adel, this is so nice to see you posting again, its been a long time but i could still feel the same magic and could still get the same shiver while reading your poems.
    I am really glad to have you in our club and its surely our priveldge.

    Loved the poem and loved the feelings that it raises deep within.

    Keep writing dear friend

    all the best and take care

  • 10 years ago

    by karin

    So nice... keep writing :-)

  • 10 years ago

    by Goth marionette

    I think U created a new description of sadness and how it turns everything into the contrast ...
    Besides that ur expressions were Original like
    (My sun is thirsty and longs to shine,My noon is night and longs to light,My rose is nodding and longs to grow...etc)...
    And ur choice of words and its usage were perfect...I liked that u used the word ( My) before sun,night,birds....It showed that u live in ur own world and that world is deformed by sadness and darkness....
    The flow also has a great influence on the poem..
    I really liked it so much...
    Great work,plz keep it up:)..

  • 10 years ago

    by ThE CrOw

    Wow that is really good i loved it the choice of words it seems so real ..keep up the writing you have a talent !!!

  • 10 years ago

    by Sourav

    You are a exceptional poet and we know that. I really can't play any critique here. Just want to say I'm amazed by your writing. Your imagery and creative piece of writing both are too good. Thanks a lot for sharing!