Comments : A place for my Head. PART II

  • 5 years ago

    by Xanthe

    "It was so peaceful there,
    black... almost dead."
    Wow. I'm fond of how you wrote: black... almost dead. Black does seem to bring the aura of death.

    "waiting for a sign on bended knee's.
    I had to move, had to leave
    To find the answer's I so desperately need."
    The apostrophe on both knee and answer are not needed. Otherwise, great word choice.

    "Can't give up with out trying,
    Or I might as well be dead..."
    This sounds hopeful. That's why I like it.

    "But part of me wants to go back through
    that door,
    That place for my head..."
    Really neat ending

    I thoroughly enjoyed reading this piece 5/5 Keep writing! :)

    -X

  • 5 years ago

    by Max

    "Life out side that place feels so estranged
    A badly written play... A lie."
    This is soo cool lines i love it and all the poems is so well written,this and the 1st part of it gives a gr8 story of life u made me feel like iam living in that amazing totally amazing
    5/5 keep on =)