"It was so peaceful there,
black... almost dead."
Wow. I'm fond of how you wrote: black... almost dead. Black does seem to bring the aura of death.
"waiting for a sign on bended knee's.
I had to move, had to leave
To find the answer's I so desperately need."
The apostrophe on both knee and answer are not needed. Otherwise, great word choice.
"Can't give up with out trying,
Or I might as well be dead..."
This sounds hopeful. That's why I like it.
"But part of me wants to go back through
That place for my head..."
Really neat ending
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this piece 5/5 Keep writing! :)
6 years ago
"Life out side that place feels so estranged
A badly written play... A lie."
This is soo cool lines i love it and all the poems is so well written,this and the 1st part of it gives a gr8 story of life u made me feel like iam living in that amazing totally amazing
5/5 keep on =)