Comments : Seraphina [The Stigma Of Your Eyes]

  • 5 years ago

    by Britt

    I have to admit, this poem totally freaks me out. You did such an amazing job with these prompts and turned it into an absolutely hauntingly chilling tale. It's been hard for me to read it, I usually have quit halfway through (or read real fast) because it scared me.. lmao.

    Your vocab choices in this poem are my favorite part, paired with how descriptive you are. The first three stanzas/couplets/chunks of this poem are what made it for me - the descriptions, the intensity, setting the scene. It was all just.. perfect. The way you incorporated those prompts were really brilliant. Saffies challenge is really bringing out some amazing things from you!

  • 5 years ago

    by Saerelune

    Hahaha, oh Britt... =p Totally agree.

    I love how the enchantress is such a re-occuring theme in your poetry, yet each time she becomes deadlier and deadlier!

    This reminds me of our old RTVW-kinda-style poetry, much more abstract, but I find it very effective in fantasy/dark writes such as these. It doesn't matter if the reader doesn't quite grasp the meaning of each individual image, because the main message is clear (this woman will be your death). What matters with this kind of poetry is keeping the tension and tone up, which you did!

    I also love the way your character entered. I bet that if it was a play, all spotlights would be aimed on her. Perhaps because of her beauty, her scary beauty.