I don't know if this was the one you were working on or not, But I'm commenting it anyway =]
I actually think you're getting better as you write. This poem was really good. And I mean that. The last stanza was really powerful and made a great ending to the poem. Theres nothing in there that needs to be changed, It doesn't need more added to it. I love it the way it is. And I'm sure others will too. Awesome job once again Kaylee. Couldn't expect anything less. Keep writing! 5/5
11 years ago
by Tara Kay
I really liked that poem, it flowed well, and made sense.
its really well written
You never cease to amaze me!
Another totally awesome write. Packed with emotion but with a strong, clear message.
You have captured the history at its worst and at its best. For all the fallen soldiers leave behind families, left to grieve their loss in the shadows.
This is a beautiful dedication to those who we so ofter forget...the ones left behind.
I think you meant "feet" not feat....and I like the use of symbolism in this poem. Most of the message was implicit in this poem and I liked that. The last lines were like the words of her father I liked the way you ended the stanzas this way. It is also clearly about more than the solider's daughter and I like the way there is usually a wider message in your poems. I took a great deal away from this. Sensational- sincerely sensational.
You did a great job on this. The flow and rhythm of itwas really good, and I love the meaning behind it. It was really good.. and I love the way that you ended it, it was a bit sad but also had a sense of pride. Great job on this!
This is a really touching poem. So sad and inspiring. War is never just. However, was is inevitable. As long as we have people running the country, there will be war. It's sad. But I really like this poem. Powerful and captivating.
"She raised her hand in her fatherâ€™s memory, final salute. Never forget those who gave you freedoms you have." Thats definately my favorite line. We should honor all of our lost soldiers. I love this poem and I know where its coming from... my brother is in the army and has faught in the war, he was one of the firsts to be sent to afganistan after 9-11.. anyways i really liked it. and you did an awesome job 5/5...
PS. In regaurds to your comment on my poems... my english teacher (who is a very talented man) has always said that poetry is about describing things in the shortest way you can, to give your reader room to imagine. Of course i dont follow any written rules, but i believe hes right.
Kaylee! WOW!!! I am so speechless but I must find a place to start!
FOr one...LOVED this title....what makes me want to read poems is the titles and I believe you need a eye caching title to get the eyes of your readers
Secondly, Outstanding choice of words in this piece I was very impressed!!!
This was so touching Kaylee I really really enjoyed this!