I LOVE the point that you are putting across! You have such talent! The only thing I recommend is that you read it aloud to yourself. There were some spelling errors or extra words. If you read it aloud to yourself you will catch those errors a lot better. 5/5

Great write its like a story that i see unfolding infront of me as i read osm job 5/5
-laura-

With the pain that tares
[[I think you mean "tears".]]

Which is soon to be bare
[[And this just sounds awkward to me.]]

With all my problems acting as a knife
Stabbing my plans
Ruining my life
[[I'm not sure why; it's cliche, but I like it.]]

Now hiding my problems
My true feelings, all the while
Hoping no one will know
What is behind my fake smile?
[[Again, cliche, but I liked it. There's something about your writing that I like. =)]]

I now turn to God
With one prayer in mind
I called up to him
And asked for him to be kind
Not at all to me
But to all who have suffered
More then I can believe
[[alghagualja. Oh. My. God. THANK YOU! [[Hugs you.]] I'm so glad someone said this, someone finally got this out and realized this...agasgiasugoaugla!]]

To my friends I return
I thank God every day
For that lesson I learned
[[Again, beautiful.]]

I was thinking this was another cliche "I hate myself" poem, yet I got a shock when it wasn't.
I absoultely adore this for the simple fact that someone finally realized this.
And there's something about your writing that really makes me like it; I'm not sure why. You write a bit clichely, but again, I don't hate it.
So.
I"ll just say keep up the great work and keep writing; you could really do something with your work.

xTheEcstasyofSuicidex 5.5

This was a great poem at first it sound kinda whiny but as you read through it the message was right there bam in your face great job keep up the great work Plot121

Good job.. the flow was a bit off but still another great poem filled with a lot of strong emotion

5/5