I'm trying...

by LeAnNe   Nov 20, 2006


I'm trying so hard to deal with this.
I'm trying so hard to move on.
I'm trying so hard to go back to how we were.
But it hurts.
It hurts more than you could ever know.
I see you and I'm ecstatic.
I love you. We love eachother.
you're my boyfriend and I need you.
We've shared so much. We're so close.
Yet now we're so far away.
Do you know how much I'm still hurting?
Can you still see it in my eyes?
I'm trying to be happy. I want to be happy.
But every time I see her, my heart breaks a little more.
I need it to be fixed. I need you to fix it.
But even you can't do that.
I wish you could. I know you wish you could.
I just want things to go back to normal.
I want to be able to move on.
I want to be the only one you think about that way.
It's not right.
A year and eight months. That's how long we've been together.
A year and eight amazing months.
But this... this just kills me.
I should be the only person you have feelings for.
And I HATE her for it.
I hate how she gets to be happy... and I get to be miserable.
I hate how upset and angry and frustrated I get just seeing her.
I HATE it so much!
I HATE everything about this situation!
I shouldn't have to try and mend my heart every day.
Pieces of it shouldn't break away every time I see her.
My heart is in your hands and I want you to fix it.
I NEED you to fix it!
I want it all to just go away.
I HATE IT!
I HATE it.
I hate it.

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