Comments : I was alone in your city

  • 10 years ago

    by Cindy

    Great job! I really enjoyed this write of yours. It is funny sometimes we can be around so many people and still feel so alone.

    Time came to say good bye
    My lips were locked for a second
    I saw you last time and gone
    I was so alone in your city

    This stanza brought a tear to my eye. Take care friend
    Cindy

  • 10 years ago

    by Allison

    This was very pretty and I found it very well written. Keep up the good work. *5/5*

    Alyson

  • 10 years ago

    by Lithium

    Thats such a sad poem, probably why its in the sad section, I hear your story honey, great work.
    Thankyou for adding me to your favourites :) I shall return the favour.

  • 10 years ago

    by Cyma Khan

    Very good agn u know who to flow ur words good work....5/5

    God bless u

  • 10 years ago

    by Carly

    Wow this is good. Any ways, you commented me on how to submitt a poem in a contest. Sorry, but the one I'm doing is for my high school, not the internet. I have no clue how to do one here.

  • 10 years ago

    by Darien

    Another great poem! I really liked the title of this poem and it caught my attention quickly, I just had to read it. I like the images this poem created, it was a beautiful scene. It had a sad ending, but it was still romantic and beautiful.

  • 10 years ago

    by BeautifulDisaster

    The stanzas are kind of weird. but it is a good poem. the wording is good and the flow is good.... 5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Robert

    This was a good write but I think you had a bit more redundance then what you wanted. I tjink if youy stayed more to the point you work would have been more powerful. Your stucture was good bit you left a defeating taste in my mouth I think if it would have been a abit boulder your work would have really shined.

  • 10 years ago

    by Sweet lig

    Ohh how does it feel to be alone in the city.. wow i love ur style....this really great message to everyone at it really touches my heart. it was so sad and i feel the great emotion. 5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by LockedInEternity

    This was really cute and at the end felt somewhat metaphorical...it was very nicely written and i liked how you repeated the title at the end of each stanza, it made it seem more powerful. This was very sweet and sad, loved it:)

  • 10 years ago

    by xxSnow Angelxx

    Loved your work!..very well penned!
    "Time came to say good bye
    My lips were locked for a second
    I saw you last time and gone
    I was so alone in your city"
    ooooo i loved these lines...so deep and touching!
    Kp up de good work!
    Xx Pooja xX

  • 10 years ago

    by LadyPearl

    Pretty good. It could have been better if you tapped into your emotions more and used similies or metaphors and those kind of stuff. Also, bravery should be bravely.

  • 10 years ago

    by Goran Rahim

    Good job with a great story to tell,
    i can relate to the part in which you are talking to the father but thinking about her, lol. it happened to me, i know how it feel

    great job again.

  • 10 years ago

    by Sydney

    Awhh. So deep and moving. I could picture it in my mind. XD. Wonderful.

  • 10 years ago

    by David

    The repetition thru out this poem was great. i found it made this poem more dramatic and strong.

    5/5 David

  • 10 years ago

    by Stephanie Naylor

    Good job, but the flow seemed a little choppy ar partts, so you might want to clear that up otherwise it was great. 5/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Vanessa

    Well written, this poem had a great flow due to the repeation, the word choice was diffrent, but brillaiant, and the emtion was heartfelt and strong. Keep up the good work. 4/5

  • 10 years ago

    by Kalee

    This is a great poem. I found the repitition of 'I was alone in your city' a little off putting. But thats just me. Other then that little thing it was great. 5/5

    Kalee

  • 10 years ago

    by tinna

    Brilliant poem, so much feeling in it! 5/5!!!

  • 10 years ago

    by April McLaren

    It was a good read but you need to have an equal amount of lines in each stanza but besides that your poem has a great flow keep up the good work