Wow! That's really powerful. Great imagery, great storyline. I wonder, at moments like these what inspired that. Is it true to some extent?
First stanza: they instead of the?
Fourth: steel instead of steal
and the last: it instead of in and the instead of hte.
I'm only being picky because its such a beautiful piece and it deserves to be recognised for that and some people are very fussy when it comes to spelling.