Comments : Little girl

  • 9 years ago

    by Darren

    Wow, love the power behind this. You take us on journey where in the beginning it seems you sympathise with the girl. Yet as the story progresses you are pointing out the bigger picture. The final line is amazing. Well done.

  • 9 years ago

    by Beautiful Soul

    The only thing that throws it off for me is the capital letters. It throws off the flow a lot. But what a raw write! The emotions here are outstanding but sad. You did a great job in staying consistent with the emotion you portrayed. Death is a really difficult thing to death with, same with pain. That what I got from this, is the pain of a little girl whom couldn't fight her demons anymore. Normally you don't think of death as "being okay" but I understand. The pain is sometimes so unbearable that there is nothing left. Great write