Comments : Me and My Monster

  • 16 years ago

    by StandStill

    This scared the hell(o) out of me jesse. i'm not even kidding. i'm almost crying. lol. it sounds like...like an argument, with yourself, but with some outside force too..

    Beautiful smile
    Beautiful lie

    ^ it is a lovely lie..isn't it?

    You can't win this battle
    I can win this war
    The ones that you love
    They won't love you more

    ^ they say love can't be a one way street...they're wrong. you can love and have it never returned..i know how it is to love and not recieve..

    A chance, maybe-
    You're not even close
    She's intoxicating
    You took a paralyzing dose

    ^ absolutely my favorite stanza of the day...wow.

    I'm the cold
    Inside your chest
    Broken, beating
    And suppressed

    ^ just proves a broken heart can still beat..

    Look into the mirror
    The dark inside your eyes
    It's the same darkness
    Under your bed it hides

    ^ scariest flipping stanza..like...ever.

    Story of a monster
    Lives inside your chest
    Screams you don't deserve her
    Even at your best

    ^ you're wrong, you know...you won't believe me. but you're wrong.

    great job, jesse...5/5

  • 16 years ago

    by MeltInHisArms

    Wow, i luv how u always put a sense of errieness and confusions that just keep u hooked until the very end! i also like how latly u put famouse quotes that match the poem perfectly, it gives it a sense of long time knolage in new words. well this is 1 of ur best so far, 5/5
    xoxo
    ~me~