A lovely poem from NOHA again....

keep it up..

best wishz... Karan

Beautiful
nice flow and rhyme,
sweet love and when it a part we got hope
to bring it back,i can feel you happy for while
but deep inside sad for being a part,i hope you well be good soon
and true love never die
well done 5/5

Thanks for the helpfull comment and i fix it

Very good write....the flow was even.....keep writing!

This is nicely written from the beginning to the end. It holds many feelings that can reach out to the readers yet I think that you have some punctuation/grammar errors through the piece.
You shouldn't put full stop at the end of every line, for example, in the first stanza, the first line doesn't make sense without the next one, so you should put comma instead of a full stop there to connect them. Same thing should be done in the first lines of the second stanza, the third stanza, the fifth stanza, the ninth stanza and the last stanza. Also, you should capitalize I through the poem (in the second stanza, the eighth stanza).
You created good flow from the beginning to the end except in the eighth stanza. The form of two lines per stanza worked well and I'm unsure why you changed it there.
All in all, this is interesting and emotional read.

It's a good intense poem. It evolves a lot of emotions. I liked it. Good to read.

Well i though it was beautiful. i loved it.

Well written 5/5

the start 'the day before that night' catchy
and the feelings that you have portrayed they are genuine.

It was very nice poem, i wish that moment of happiness to be repeated again and stay forever

I wish if i could be strong.
`It should be either "I wish I could be strong" or "I wish I could've been strong." Unless you want to keep the "if" in the sentence -- then you'd have to rearrange the words in order for it to make sense.

Why did you left me if you really loved me,
`Watch the verb tense -- left should be leave.

Or its my end and like this it should to be.
`Or is it my end and this is how it should be sounds more flowy to me -- but that's just me. I don't know how it would end up reading in your eyes.

Its all I ever could have hope for,
`Verb tense -- hope should be hoped.

they left my head,just flew a way.
`There shouldn't be a space in away .

for together we have joined our soul,
`soul should be souls -- since you can't join a single soul with nothing. souls leads to it meaning that you combined both of your souls -- which is what I think you're going for from what I've read.

Overall, I didn't really get the emotion in this piece until the very end -- because the closing couplette is great. But the rest of it ... is pretty cliche. Like:

When I heard your voice,
It brought a smile to my face.

When I heard your laugh,
my heart began to race.
`Overused concepts, and considering some pieces that I've read from you before, I was expecting a lot more uniqueness. You had your highs, but most of them were downs to me, like the emotion just didn't fly out like you wanted them to be...They're there, but they haven't blossomed. Get what I mean?
Keep writing.
..__MiNDYY

I can relate to the situation nice poem and write, i liked the sadness and hapiness in it.

This poem is cute^u^
I like it..
keep up the good work!

A simply amazing piece of poetry. i believe that yoou are an absolutely brilliant writer. i feel sorry for your loss, how everything is not back but it is good to write down how you felt at that time.

a most wonderful write!

5/5

Keep Writing, hun
As Always,
~NinjaGirl~

Very good poem. It was filled with happiness and sadness all at once! I think you did an excellent job. Keep up the good work and you will continue to improve.

Awww.. how simple yet a very touching poem reminds me of a feling of bing loved and loving someone.. great work

Well this was a very sweet poem.
But you didn't keep a consistant flow.
You changed the flow the the rhyming
pattern at the end and that through off
the poem. But well done.
<3Tay 5/5

Wow. this is an amazing poem.
It seems like a lot of emotion for you was in this.
It must have been a very special day for you to hear his voice again.
Amazing.
Keep it up. 5/5