Oooh...that made me shudder and want to throw up, i do believe. and not a lot of poems do that to me any more. the simplicity of the lines punctuates the point you're trying to get across and gives the reader a sick feeling. the concept is wonderful. good job, keep up the good work.

Ummm...i guess i got something completely different out of your piece..the poem was of a morbid sort i guess, but in a beautiful way...i enjoyed it very much and had to re-read it a few times, to grasp the full emotion that i needed to gather from it to write this comment, and after reading it over and again, i found it more pleasing each time, not as haunting, nice wording, superb use of minimal lines, that i felt really worked...over all a kick ass poem..well done!

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