Wow.. this poem is amazing.

it i was literally in awe.

your choice of words and your choice of style made the poem unique.
and i love the parentheses.. i like how they kinda went together. i cant explain it but i love it lol.

beautifully done.

definately 5/5

Breath
`breathe

I could not live nor breath without you.
`for some reason, I feel like it should be "I cannot live nor breathe without you." The verb tense seems screwy ... Or maybe I'm going crazy.

Huh, I think you should watch your "..."s. It gives a sort of ... prolonged pause, and sometimes it's unnecessary. It kind of me made me think the person talking was like that chick in John Tucker Must Die -- have you seen it? She waits three seconds (she counts EXTREMELY slow) until she says something, and seems sort of daft. The continuous use of "..." after each quote made me think that ... and it made me laugh x)

A stopped heart cracks as the key falls into your hands.
`I adore this line like crazy! It's so ... pretty? LOL Sorry for a lack of vocabulary, but I can't find a term that will do it justice. It's an absolutely glamorous image -- and the key, can not only be a metaphorical one for your heart, but also living together, you share the same locks.

cheek more
`stick a comma, or some form of punctuation between those two lines, because there's a necessary pause between those words in order for the sentence not to run on and for it to make sense.

A lonely tear slips down my cheek more follow behind,
I am now fully awakened by your disappearance.
`This makes me think ... when you don't want to accept it -- or you just can't accept that that person is gone. Some people, like me, cry and don't even realize it. In this case, it's shedding tears that make everything real.

Overall, I liked it. It wasn't absolutely AMAZiNG. There's definite room for improvement, and at times, it felt like reading prose forever. But you have some gorgeous lines in there that are absolutely poetic, and your ending phrase is just ... wow .
..__MiNDYY

This is an amazing poem., everything has a meaning to someone about their love ones or the ones who they loved, and you showed it here of what phrase of words they used to you and how you felt.

keep it up.
keep on writing.
love always and forever.

Wow. This poem was really unique. I loved the format.. you broke up the whole sentence I guess into little pieces and made them a little stanza of their own, in the end it all came together very nicely. You did a fabulous job and I yet again very much enjoyed this write!
You did a oustanding job. The poem leaves me speechless.
5/5