Comments : Serendipity (Collaboration with my Fiancee Karl Wild)

  • 11 years ago

    by Karl Wild GG23

    We're the most amazing couple ever beautiful :) I love you sooo much xoxox mwahh my heart...5/5 I wuv you

  • 11 years ago

    by BREEawNUHH

    First of all, I think this is beautifully written.

    "She holds my heart in the palm of her hands,
    Careful not to drop it or squeeze too tight,
    Her love like an ocean will meet all sands,
    In the darkness she is my guiding light."

    ^^ This is a fantastic opening stanza. I quite like how the love you two share already shines through. "In the darkness she is my guiding light" <--- Possibly one of the most beautiful lines I've come across in any poem.

    "When our eyes meet her love gives me a rose,
    I'll forever walk in her garden of love,
    Feelings I get from my head to my toes,
    Nobody else in this world is placed above."

    ^^ Aw. This stanza is very sweet. It's absolutely mind-blowing. You two have definite talent.

    "Life in her arms is perpetual bliss,
    Holding me close I can taste her sweet skin,
    With lips to die for, I'd die for her kiss,
    We're a coin, heads and tails, we'll always win."

    ^^ Ah. Your word choice in this stanza is amazing.

    "Serendipity brought us love so real,
    I wish this was something you all could feel."

    ^^ The ending is absolute perfection. It's a great way to end the poem, and yet it still shows how much you two love each other.

    Overall; I loved it, obviously. You two have written a beautiful piece together. 5/5

    ``Briana

    & congratulations to you both. :]

  • 11 years ago

    by HvN

    Very sweet, one of the best collabs. i've seen yet. You've got great flow, great word choice and descriptions :]

    You 2 are perfect! :]

    5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Minkus

    Nicely done. It's well worth reading without being absolutely mind-blowing, so I gave it a four. Very tender, very pleasant to read. I hope you have a happy wedding!

  • Congrats!I'm glad that there is still love in this world.I was beginning to wonder personally.But this was a lovely poem.

    "Life in her arms is perpetual bliss,
    Holding me close I can taste her sweet skin,
    With lips to die for, I'd die for her kiss,
    We're a coin, heads and tails, we'll always win."

    ^This was my favorite stanza hands down. Simpily beautiful.I'd love to read more poems like this so keep it up.5/5

    -amber-

  • 10 years ago

    by Fredy

    Amazing poem and i thank you for the english lesson at the end lol.... the flow of the poem is amazing it never abruptly stops it's just very well written