Comments : Dying Nation

  • 15 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    A great piece...

    Dying Nation
    ^^
    I love this title, it really draws the reader in.

    Anguished, frustrated
    Cowering Inside,
    Trapped in cobweb
    Nation's life.
    ^^
    Wonderful imagery. I can imagine being the unfortunate bug in the web. Or a citizen with stiffled voice, unable to flee the trappings of the dictator.

    Disentangle, escape
    Tightening grip,
    Handcuffed by
    Society's whip.
    ^^
    The struggle of the bug continues. The fight for freedom is thwarted by the over bearing spider. Using strength to bully and intimidate.

    Hypocrats, Scandals
    Stymieing progress,
    Repressed opinion
    Honesty undressed.
    ^^
    Media - a tool of an evil dictator, paid to pollute a nation, give them a false sense of reality.

    Bomb-Blast, massacres
    Breaking events,
    Delighted vultures
    Hunger content.
    ^^
    'Delighted vultures' such evilness. The hunger quenched, but for how long? Not long enough, I say!!

    Well done. This is a powerfully emotive. I hope it causes people to re-think!!

    Michael

  • 15 years ago

    by Prasad Baadkar

    I think its up to us to go d RANG DE$ BASANTI way..

    Cuz its not d humans killing innocent humans... Its... politics n politicians & their greed for everything & at all costs...

    Anyway a nice poem...

    Keep it up..

    best wishz... Karan

  • 15 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    Excellent title, first of all. It definatly wanted me to read it from the beginning, although I'm only returning the favor. I was very excited to read this piece. :] Anyways...

    I absolutely adored the vocabulary you used! It was so amazing and everything was full great imagery! I was suprised well written this one. This poem was full of description and imagery all in all, it was a well write and definatly reflected off of the title VERY well. Great write, you had a unique way of describing a "Dying Nation" - Well done. 5/5.

  • 15 years ago

    by NyellMoonlight

    Powerful poem.

    You picked great topic to write about, and you managed to say so much within just four stanzas which is truly impressive. This is like a summary of everything that happens around us every day, and it really made me think. This is excellently written, I think that you chose the right words to describe the society today. The title is excellent, too, it pulled me into the poem.

    - Disentangle, escape
    Tightening grip,
    Handcuffed by
    Society's whip.-
    ^^^
    Very effective stanza, vivid and great in so many ways. I like the metaphor in the last two lines a lot, it is powerful.

    - Hypocrats, Scandals
    Stymieing progress,
    Repressed opinion
    Honesty undressed.-
    ^^^
    This is my favorite stanza from the poem, it is absolutely fantastically written, and, sadly, so true.

    I totally agree with your thoughts from this piece. You did great job.

    Keep up!

  • 15 years ago

    by silent turbulence

    Reminds me of my Poem "Words of a Bloeeding Nation"... trully well written!! brilliant!

  • 15 years ago

    by Sourav

    A very well structured poem. It shows the realty. Good style of writing. A very good job!

  • 15 years ago

    by ForeverASickKid

    Im speechless this poem was amazing

  • 15 years ago

    by Rhiannon

    Perfect ending.
    Kudos.

  • 15 years ago

    by Good Enough

    Wow. this is good. its like a punch in the face with all those harsh words but they mean so much.

  • 15 years ago

    by Biya

    Excellent !!!! Absolutely right ! wow !
    I like this poem so much ...
    I give you 5/5
    Cheers
    Biya