Wow that was really great. Keep it up. Shanik

"Astounding bursts of colour stain the golden sky
A booming voice, then silence, there's a glint in every eye
Belonging grips my heart, regret and anger die
Accepted into Heaven, St Peter lets me by"

that is my favorite stanza. It's because it explains everything. The words are also the most beautiful. They are sweet, and creative, but interesting.
I like this piece, but I think mostly it needs more color. Vibrant words need to make it shine. Make is glamorous and full of glimmer. Make it amazing. Other than that, it's good.
Creative!!

Lexie