I gotta say it's wonderfukl in the way it is,,,, But if you'll decide to add more, i'm sure it's gonna be better than its already is... =)! 5/5

You could never understand or foresee
How much what you say affects me

I liked that Stanza. It was really really nice. It was one of the better ones that I've seen. I'm not sure why, I just seemed to like the way it came out.

Rythme was off and it was missing a few things here and there, but nothing major that took away from the poem. I would just watch the syllables.

Im not sure who dis onez about but itz great=p.. i love it Cara i love it ;).. 5/5

"It pours over my heart and creates a storm
Sadness, emptiness and loneliness form."
[It pours over my heart, creating a storm
sadness, emptiness, and loneliness form]
- It's not like the first change is NEEDED, it's just my preference. As for the comma in the second change (second line) that is needed. A lot of people confuse (or forget) a comma in lists of words because when you're writing something like broken, black and blue you don't need a comma because 'black and blue' is a phrase instead of a list.

In the last line I'd suggest spelling out k as Okay just to make it grammatically correct. It's not a big deal, doesn't take away from the poem or anything.

I really liked this poem. I think you did a good job with writing it and it seems to be well thought-out.

It's really cute too, in an innocent and pure way. Instead of 'my body yearns for your body' and all that stuff, lol. (: It was really refresing!

I feel like this poem was sitting in my heart and you wrote it down more beautifly that I ever could have. I love the last line " So you gotta remember, I love you, okay? " Sooooo beautiful, and I can just picture myself doing this, watching for him to sign on, and how certain things he says really effect me even thought I know they shouldn't. Amazing flow, B-E-A UTIFUL! <3

5/5 + <3

OMG! This was like spot on a few years ago for me, when I used to talk with Liz on msn. Although, this can be viewed as cliche, you bring a new light to it with such raw emotions. I loved it. Great job, keep up the great work.

Peace, Joe