Well, I surely love this poem. I loved the metaphors you used and how you worded them perfectly. The first stanza, last two lines could be reworded a bit. They're kind of throwing the flow off. Other than that you have a wonderful poem here, well written. I had naturally thought that due to the short/long line changes that it would be off in flow, but it wasn't at all. It was well written and pieced together. Best poem of yours, by far.