Comments : Landscape of the Lonely

  • 12 years ago

    by Sylvia

    Loved this. I know you have the link of the image given but it would be wonderful to see the fence as we read. Would be very moving. 5/5

  • 12 years ago

    by Cindy

    What a unique way to write for the image contest. I would have nevere thought to write from the view of the fence post. Congrats for winning 2nd place with this poem :)

    Across and open field far beyond the shady trees.
    Underneath a changeable sky, stirs a gentle breeze.

    Your imagery and word choices for this piece are awesome. Your words really brought the picture to life.

    Built sturdy and strong my owner long since passed.
    Back in the good old days, things were built to last.

    You make the reader conect with this piece of wood as they read your words. It is almost like it comes to life.

    Standing proud and rugged many years of service I've done.
    Solitude in my secluded home, service below a beating sun.

    I love the way the wood relates to the reader telling it's life story. Making you feel his pain and loneliness.

    A prisoner to this ground confinement sealed long ago.
    Only companion blades of grass swaying slightly to and fro.

    The slolitude of only blades of grass as compainions. Your only entertainment watching them move in the wind.

    Seemed like another life when I was tall with emerald leaves.
    Axe man's blade fell swiftly, brought me violently to my knees.

    Wow these lines really hit the heart...the pain of being felled by the axe. Violent just like the tree is a victim of a crime and then sentenced to spend a life sentence as a post.

    Now only but a shadow, though my grain still firm and strong.
    Never believed my sad existence would ever last this long.

    You can feel the post wishing he would perish from termites or dry rot :( How sad.

    Doomed to the landscape of the lonely my story I do tell.
    Damned, empty and all alone in the beauty of my hell.

    Awesome ending...the beauty of the landscape is punishing to the fence post who is stuck umable to move.
    Excellent job!
    ~Clapping~
    Love Cindy

  • 12 years ago

    by Dixiedaisy

    Dear I absolutely love the direction you took in this poem. It was very graceful and distinguished to talk as though you were the fencepost and the life that it has endured. Very touching and beautiful write my dear and congratulations on the contest as well.

    Take Care,
    Kay

  • 12 years ago

    by End Of Eternity

    Congratulations for your first contest. Its really a great poem and i loved it right from the time i read it for the first time.
    You are surely one talented writer but then that seems to be in blood... :)

    all the best and take care

  • 12 years ago

    by Sourav

    Wonderfully described poem. I liked the lines of the poem very much. Very intense and touching. Specially liked these two lines...

    'seemed like another life when I was tall with emerald leaves.
    Axe man's blade fell swiftly, brought me violently to my knees.'

    Well written!

  • 12 years ago

    by Lonely Rider

    Beautiful piece ...

    "Damned, empty and all alone in the beauty of my hell."

    ^^ I simply loved this line... its so powerful... and touching...

  • 12 years ago

    by Pink Butterfly

    Your poem flows so gorgeously!!! This is really awesome!!! Well crafted....Very creative....You are amazing!!! Keep it up!

    -Pink Butterfly-