This is... so absolutely amazing. It took me a minute to grasp it all, but once I did I couldn't help but think that you are a very skilled writer. I mean there is mostly a flow here, the word choice is amazing, you set a tone and stick with that. There is a wonderful use of emotion.

When I first saw this piece, I assumed it would be nothing but story, there would be no voice and no emotion. I was greatly underestimating your talent. Because this is just the opposite of my assumption. You have an excellent show of your voice, in this piece.

It seems like you were creative and you knew what you wanted exactly. Which works for this piece. I love it, so this gets a 5/5 from me.

Oh my, what a masterpiece
The rhymes flowed perfectly, and were masterfully done, the emotion was deep and raw and the words were just amazing.

You did the best job with this piece, I am in awe over your talent

loved it
love
Tara
xxxx

This is really dark, the imagery you created was really creepy. The use of caps lock was very creative, really pulled me to read.

"I licked the knife after each and every one
Until I tasted true love I wasn't truly done"
-> My favorite lines :) Really gives off a dark and creepy atmosphere. I shudder to think of it, but it's only a metaphor, I presume?

Anyway, it's a beautiful piece. I loved reading it. Keep writing! 5/5

-X

Great write...