Comments : Worst Pain

  • 14 years ago

    by Ingrid

    Katie,

    This one was very well written also..but the content was very disturbing to me.

    I will stay close to you girl, until you have found your way back to the light:)

    *hugs*
    5/5 Ingrid

  • 14 years ago

    by silvertung69

    Good write.I fell right through the flow.4/5 good job

  • 14 years ago

    by Skyfire

    This poem portrays such anguish. :( It is beautifully and sadly provocative.

  • 14 years ago

    by Lady Nik

    I look up with pleading eyes
    Surrounded by all my lies
    My tears bleed red as I twist and turn
    Screams fill the silence as I slowly burn

    *Wow what an intense way to start a poem. It makes me really wonder what's happening to you. I love the diction you use as well*

    Aching inside from all the hurt
    Trampled over like I am dirt
    She's looking out from within
    Forced to pay for my own sin

    *I love the second line. That's a really great metaphor, I can really pcture it too*

    Flames lick my body as I cry "no more"!
    I'm bruised and broken to the core
    Clawing pain slowly eats at my soul
    Rips away everything that made me whole

    *Hmmm I would have liked to see more happen with this but I love what you wrote. This last stanza was flawless but as a whole this was a very creative and creepy poem. I loved reading it. Keep it up hun. Nik :) *

  • 14 years ago

    by LiiSaMaRiie

    Howw sad.
    Totally impowering.

  • 14 years ago

    by aubreigh

    Wow, haha thats all i can really say! it was great and filled with soo much feeling. keep it up :)