Wow. Sorry bout your loss dear. It is very hard to lose a child, even one that you didn't have a chance to meet. I've been in situations where the doctors say there is nothing they can do. I lost my mom and grandmother this past year with "nothing no one can do". Very hard. Very. It's hard, but you just have to keep living. Live the life you have. Get through the hard times. For me, it's all the great people in my life. I just think of them and they give me hope eh. ( : Hope things get better for ya!