Comments : My Angel

  • 13 years ago

    by No1ButMe

    I really liked this. Although you lost me in the three lines
    Your lips that taste of blood
    Your gift of a black rose bud
    Your heart that loves no one
    The last line doesn't go with anything else. So it seemed to me either a line was missing or the line should be taken out. My suggestion would be to add another line, since the line of loving no one is so strong. But the theme was a good pick and I loved the thought of something so beautiful also being so deadly. Classic. Anyways great job, and can't wait to read more. 5/5