Comments : Falling heart

  • 11 years ago

    by CryingHeart

    Small but made a big impact

  • 10 years ago

    by Baby Rainbow

    Clouds like smoke rising from the ground,

    - add a comma onto the end here.

    a place where I have buried my fears and worries,

    - another comma at the end.

    a place where I rest in peace.

    - add in "a" at the beginning of here.

    It is my falling heart.

    - full stop at the end here.

    Other than the punctuation, the poem itself is really powerful. It holds a lot of imagery and description.

    The title is relatable too, we all feel that sense of sadness, loneliness sometimes, when we feel our hearts are so heavy and falling.

    I like how you described a few things first, the emotion, and then ended it with showing us what you have described is indeed your heart. I like when this is done in poetry.

    Well done.

    • 10 years ago

      by DarkLight

      Thanks... will do that.

  • 8 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Lovely little piece