Your personality is static, clinging to my body like
annoying charges of lightning. Shocking me, pulling me
in to quench the hunger of your jolt. Your electrifying effect
leaves a pigmented scar that never heals or lightens.
- irremovable.

- what an opening Chels chels. Wow. such imagery here of being drawn into something dangerous and no matter how much we pull away they manage to draw us back each time. Love the use of weather to express this.

No one knew of this chemistry between us and as I
walk around electrocuted by the storm that brewed
these past months, I'm ashamed. Ashamed that I
fell in a deep, heavenly, made up version of two
people whose intimacy deserved to happen.

-again I like the way you ave continued with the weather, to express further emotion on this. It feels here as though there is deep regret behind the lines and perhaps they did not know how much they meant to you and you would have wanted them to know? Or others did not understand what you both meant to each other so you feel alone with the emotion.

No one knew that I was your beach, and when you
struck sand, you turned me into glass. Now here
I am, crafted and completely breakable. Now here
I am, pondering in the truth of our...

-What do you call what we had?-

- Oh, love this extra line added, it shows that you are so deeply hurt that you do not even know what to call the time you had together. Was it love or perhaps not, maybe that would be too painful to admit? Love the sand and glass metaphor, this was very brilliant and shows how much you were affected and how fragile you have now become after it.

Oh, but they can see it now. They can tell by the
expression on my face that someone has sucked
the life out of me and I am asphyxiated. They can
tell that desperation lived amongst my brittle heart.

- this is very heart breaking, to know that you no longer even hide it from others, you are at the point where you do not care and this is plain to see for anyone who looks you in the eyes. The desperation shows how much you wanted to hold on to what you had, or maybe it was just holding onto anything.

They know...that at night I don't sleep because these
wrinkles are waves that ripple amidst heavy shores.
I can not conceal my disappointment, nor regret.
You're now exposed through my sight, my tone.

My best kept secret, now greatly revealed

- Excellent way to end with such power and leaving me with the image of someone lying in bed totally giving in to their emotions and just letting them all pour out through the words and feeling like that is where they belong, to be shared and to be read because you can no longer keep the secret.

Really loved your description and metaphors in this piece and feel it is very powerfully portraying a loss of love that once meant everythign to you and now it is sinking in that perhaps it is gone.

enjoyed this x

Sometimes the struggles and heartaches in life can be concealed for a time, but in the end they become exposed through a persons eyes... oh sweet one, you do know how to pen your feelings onto paper... This left me teary in my coffee... beautiful piece here...