Comments : Abrazo.

  • 10 years ago

    by Piogga

    One word that popped in my head immediately after reading: Elegant. I love how each image/metaphor is intertwined subtly yet evidently without being too suggestive.

    "music
    echoing streets of Argentina."

    this part seemed awkward when I read it. I think "through" after echoing would fix that, or some other preposition?

    Love the Spanish ending as well. Rolls off the tongue perfectly.

  • 10 years ago

    by Hellon

    I don't know any spanish whatsoever but I did know what the title of your poem meant so that's what drew me in...This was so elegant Temps...it was hot and ...well clammy as I imagined the two dancers getting into this tango..

    His breath tingled her spine,
    while eyes mimicked passion;
    locked in stalemate, their hip
    bones like dimples, softly
    sweeping against one another,
    before sliding into intimacy -

    OMG..how sensual was that!!! the way you described the bodies moulding together was perfect and in no way smutty...as I say..I have no knowledge of spanish so I'm glad you translated your ending into english which fitted perfectly with the title...loved it!!!

  • 10 years ago

    by ASPHYXIATED

    I don't usually comment on poems which need no constructive criticism, but this was just beautiful. I love it. I've re-read over it a number of times now, and each time it flows better than the last. It's like a love story vacuum packed into a poem. Great use of your talent. (: