Comments : Watcher

  • 7 years ago

    by IdTakeABulletForYou

    "Do I beak the clasps, on my wrists," I believe "beak" is supposed to be "break." That's the only technical error I found in this poem.

    Otherwise, this poem is strong and beautiful. This world we live in is falling apart into social schisms that allude to another civil war or even worse -- nuclear. It's so difficult to watch this world tear itself apart, wishing I could save it though knowing I can't -- I can't even control the goings-on in my own life, never mind the world's. You really have a knack for depth, I can see from this poem. It does not just touch upon the subject [of social dichotomy where everyone is either on the "winning" side or the "losing side], it revels in it. Every aspect is visited, and validated by the reader's own experiences. Truly eye-opening.

    Honestly a great write, and I hope to see more from you,
    5/5
    IdTakeABulletForYou

  • 6 years ago

    by mossgirl19

    This is seriously a great piece, full of musings and realizations about the world. It was lengthy but full-packed and I enjoyed the whole piece. Well- written!