Comments : Myself

  • 7 years ago

    by Mr. Darcy

    Hello Brenda

    The voice of an unbalanced mind struggling to remain sane, trying to keep within a society norm.

    I like the form, one colomn of troubled mind. My only suggestion is you could tweak words, like placing loud in capitals, or elongating st-ru-gg-ling might cause the reader to struggle reading it. Just a suggestion.

    A well thought out piece with humorous points and sombre points. I pity the person sharing a desk with you. Lol

    Take care,

    Michael

    • 7 years ago

      by Brenda

      Michael, thank you! I did take your suggestions and tweaked those areas. Thankfully we have partitions between our desks so my co-workers are fairly safe when my head starts spinning sideways. BTW, I'm a hoot at work, I keep the humor up to keep me sane, it's all good...enjoy your day! Brenda

  • 7 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Hello Brenda

    I do hope this poem isn't too literal. However, if it is, I completely understand the feelings you describe; I frequently feel like this myself.
    I like the short sharp lines too - they work to make an already hectic piece even more so.

    Take care and all the best,
    Ben

    • 7 years ago

      by Brenda

      Ben, thank you! It's not too literal, unfortunately I'm at that age where Mother Nature has decided she's going to bi*** slap me on a daily basis so it's been a struggle but I'm working through it. I use a lot of humor to get through the day lol! Take care-Brenda

  • 7 years ago

    by Em

    Brenda, a lovely write about the nemesis mind.

    I think we all reach an age where balance of the mind is forgotten, if that makes sense.
    We all have our off days though no matter what age we are.

    Em

    Ps like the structure.

    • 7 years ago

      by Brenda

      Aww thanks Em! Yeah, I have days where I'm not sure if I am coming or going...lol