Comments : Undirected Pain

  • 19 years ago

    by Semaran

    This poem sucks i tried to hard for the rhym and forgot the meaning.. It still shows how i felt but.. i hate rhyming

  • 19 years ago

    by Semaran

    GOd i hate the structure of this poem

  • 19 years ago

    by Eibutsina

    this was deep and descriptive, you painted a really gloomy dark picture with your words - well done...i think that ties in with the dark side of obsession you did so well in communicating this in your writing - well done!

  • 19 years ago

    by Semaran

    This is the first poem i wrote in along time.. I wrote the first paragraph a on the day i relised that i loved someone and they loved me.. This love was never meant to be. As our relationship progressed the situation changed and so did my mind the centre part of the poem was written after the first time i tried to throw you away.. i hurt myself in many ways that day. But not to be our love broke through all barriers i raised to protect myself.. I knew the danger of such love.[I sent you these lines sometime after but you deleted my message assuming they were song lyrics or simmilar]
    The second paragraph i wrote nearing the end of our relationship.. I knew something was wrong just not what it was. the final few lines were written post us. They are telling me something. That all pain all love all misery can be broken someday i will be alright. I logically believe this although my heart does not.
    Every line of this is true.. or was true at somepoint. so many things i say to you in this poem and although you will never read it and even if you did wouldnt pick up the things i have said but these things are free from my mind now they are nolonger bound by the barriers of my consiousness my thoughts.
    It scares me so much how close you came and on what little chance i had to take that stroke the one that would have killed you.... Never make promises of death, For all the love i had for you for all the love i will always have please never Promise to yourself such again.