Hey. You need to shove a couplemore apostrophes into the last three lines, but I'll let you hunt down where, it'll be exciting. Anyway, I thought that your use of sleep as a metaphor for death was...well not cliche but common. However the lullaby aspect of it made the whole poem er... not cliche... oh right, original. In Robert Frost's Stopping by the Woods on a Snowy Evening, he uses the metaphor of a dark and deep wood to symbolize death, so maybe in future poems you can explore other metaphors for suicide and death.

didnt like it ... not one of your best

hiya =) nice one =) hey hope u pass by my site =) wrote a poem titled BURIED FAITH... its kinda ok... but i'll let u decide... ciao darlin