1st.. ignore the rating.. I am finding that the majority of readers on this site have specifics ideas of what poetry is and is not... they seem to eat up the oh-so-sweet love poetry. i tend to think this is incredibly creative and original.. i also like he simplicity of stanzas and rhyme.. works well with what you are trying to say (as does naming the characters what you have). given the other poems you have submitted.. you show a versatility here that is refreshing.