Very good Tamara. You painta very vivid picture with your words.

Just a few pictures we need to fix.... :)

Line 2--I think you want "collage" (random collection, picture) not "college" (institute of higher learning)

Line 10--last word needs to be "heart" (a "hart" is a deer)

those are the main ones... a few of your words seem forced, like you used them just to prove you could, but this is not bad at all.

Keep writing!

thnks 4 ur comment i fixed it

As Ann Marie said...you do paint a very vivid picture. The emotions you convey through your choice of words is astounding. Certainly keep writing...Holly