Am I Ready?

I have a feeling that you're urging
But its my duty to stop you from emerging
I cant tell you that I'm not ready
You'd only laugh at me for being steady

So do I?
Do I try?
I feel too young.
I feel like I'd regret it and feel dumb

I don't want to
It's a choice i made for the sake of me and you
If we do this now
Teach me how to bear it. How?

I cant go through this
It seems so painful with love and bliss
I cant ignore you
you and your urges to do this

I want to make you happy
but does that mean making me feel crappy?
Do I love you so much?
That I'd let you touch?

If this is the only way..
I guess I have to say..
Im sorry..
Not now, but maybe someday