Life is a precious and should be perserved and even though you go through tough times you dont give up.

I really liked this. You pretty much summed up much of the world's faults and the people which have caused just those. i really like how you displayed a downfall, and added lines that described the bitterness and reality of the world and society as a cold thing that desires nothing beautiful but for itself. I really admired the lines,
"This is our America my friends,
yes, the secrets out,
and it will never change, till time mends,
no matter how loud you shout."
Well written.

My only critisizm is that your rhym scheme didn't really follow through. It didn't quite flow, I don't think it contributed to the piece at all, and it seemed to fall in and out.

Other than that, good job

Good poem and thanks for commenting

excellent job! i loved it so much! thanks for the comment/vote. it meant a lot! take care and God bless!

Excellent write! I love it...hehe...Its well written, especially the beginning was good. Take care, keep on writing,
Satuxxa

nice job...keep it up..check out some of my poems when u get a chance..vicky

At certain places it didn't flow so well but i loved the way it ended and seeing i don't live in America it's not my place to comment on that or judge but it still was very interesting.