Comments : Pax Americana

  • 19 years ago

    by pinkalias

    hm...I did enjoy it, but it's not at all like your other works. If I just saw this on the site I would have no idea it was by you.
    Not necessarily a bad thing, but I have to be honest, your usual symbolism and imagery wasn't there. To me it was very blunt and there were hardly any hidden meaning's or defined images.
    Also, i have to say that the beginning stance was very weak. It lacked in impact and emotional depth, not a good start for the piece.

    However, as the poem proceeded it turned over to an expressed emotion written in a poetic way. You did an excellent job of setting out your opinion and expressing the anger in a set tone for the piece. I have almost opposite views of these lines,
    "Who cares if we have a crusading leader
    who thinks he's God's hand on earth?
    There's only Genesis for the Bible reader
    to "scientifically" explain humanity's birth."
    But my views don't apply here, and they were my favorite lines in the poem.

    Overall, pretty well done, but I know that you can do alot better.

  • 19 years ago

    by FTS Miles

    I would have to agree completely with you, Pink... I posted it hoping for comments. Just didn't come together as I had wanted it to do, and I think that was majorly because I did write it in a spate of anger.

    Have to say I was intrigued by your saying you have an almost opposite view of the lines you quoted. So what exactly did that mean if I may ask?

  • 19 years ago

    by chavii

    its powerful n very well a depicts anger n frustation of common man.
    well written.

    --chavii--

  • 19 years ago

    by pinkalias

    FTS* i didn't mean anything disrespectful, it's just that I don't believe in god, and I do believe in evolution. the only reason why I added that I had different views was to point out how skilled the lines were considering my views are totally different, but the beauty about them still persuaded them to be my favorites in the piece.

  • 19 years ago

    by FTS Miles

    Ahhh... then I did understand you. For a second there I thought that you had been agreeing with the lines themselves and not the sarcasm presented in them, but had recognized the sarcasm and yet liked the lines regardless. Did that make sense?

    Anyway, glad to hear it was as I first understood it. Makes much more sense considering what I've come to understand of you from your poetry and comments.