Thats a cool poem, i realli liked the way it was set out and how it rhymed. it was a good job, cant wait to read more of your poems. let me know when you do any moren and i'll check them out. good luck for your future writing. vikki xxx

That was awesome.. really i dont think i have any suggestions/crits, as i usually do.. but this was great.. the main part of this poem that really drew me in and stirred my wonder was the flow, using the words to create such a rhythm.. it was great.. the ending(last 3 lines) did sort of disappoint me.. i mean they weren't bad, but it just didnt seem like a proper ending for such a poem.. it seems like it's forced, and that, i htink, takes away from the quality.. id suggest a rework of the last two lines to maintain the quality feel,.. thats about it.. i loved your paradoxes in relation to confusion.. i really love fiddling with that sort of thing while writing and you've done a great job.. keep it up.. pZ

This was a very nice poem to read. the first lines were very alluring and made me want to read on. you're off to a very good start! keep up the good work!

Hey, I liked that, it had spunk!

Good Writing!
beth

Very intertesting. it kept me thinkin, good job

I like it good flow, wonderful poem. xD Keep up the great work.

Hey nice poem keep it up