Wow,.. I can't believe I missed this one before.. nice visuals, perfect for the premise of the poem,.. some would probably say you should shorten the poem, as you could express the overall point in a shorter way - but this really doesn't apply, i don't think,..the language you used was really emotive and offset the intensity of this piece.. i also loved the flow, how you effortlessly glided between stanzas and a awesome execution of the ending, too.. good stuff..

Wow,.. I can't believe I missed this one before.. nice visuals, perfect for the premise of the poem,.. some would probably say you should shorten the poem, as you could express the overall point in a shorter way - but this really doesn't apply, i don't think,..the language you used was really emotive and offset the intensity of this piece.. i also loved the flow, how you effortlessly glided between stanzas and a awesome execution of the ending, too.. good stuff..