Hey, u r good...spl considering the fact that u r new...regarding how shud u improve... well just look around other poems and u may find the ways.. but i must admit that u hv done good in ur first one...as it comes right from ur heart and thats what matters..all the best and take care

That was a nice poem. A bit confusing towards the end but nice. Keep up the good work!!!! Looking forward to reading more!