'It's dirty and melting'
I would suggest taking away 'It's' to maintain the consistency of the poem. It will help with the flow. Just my point of view, hope you don't mind. =)

I enjoy this as much as the other one, it literally takes my breath away. Wonderful descriptions coupled with beautiful imaginery. Thanks for sharing another brilliant piece. =)

Ty for your comments Dreams..I really appreciate your input.

Beautiful poem, hon.