This is good, although the first stanza seems a little weeker than the rest, it is overall a good peice

I'll have to agree that the first stanza does seem a bit weak compared than the rest. Also, it took me a few times to read through it before I got the meaning of it. Maybe it's just me. I did love the last stanza though.

The rhyming is good, and the last stanza is definately the best - but again I had to read it through a few times as well. However - there seems to be pretty deep meaning in it :)
Keep it up

Peace. [Sole]

Wow very meaningful writing here. Really brilliant. This really does stand out and made me think.

All the Best
Sondos

I loved this one!..it made me think....and the best poems are those kind....very well written also... 5/5!
~*Linz*~

That is cool. very unique and interesting to read. good meanings and word choice

I like this poem. It's definitely different....for some reason, it seems like you could have added more. To be honest, I have a very vague idea of what you're trying to say...perhaps that's why I feel it's unfinished. The first two lines, they caught my attention though, and it's nice to become engulfed in poems....that doesn't happen often. Anyway, nice write. Maybe you could clarify a little bit?