The ending just seemed out of place. The first two stannzas were really good and then it seemed more like a suicide thing and whatever did stand out seemed ot be washed away and fall into the same cliche. I think you should fix up the spelling erros, which are few, and try and think outside of what others are writing about. It is a good poem and the first two stanzas really stood out from other poems.

I loved it epsically the start it got weaker towards the end but it was sweet well done xx ALLY xx