Wow, that was a really good poem. Really like the rhymes, and the metaphor behind this poem. Good stuff.

"A slave to the darkness
No one answers my call."

The rhythm was off, why don't you try,
"A slave to darkness
No one hears my call"

but you can use whatever you like, just a minor suggestion :)

This is a brill poem it flowed really well.
really really good work mate.
5/5 nothing wrong with this

Great metaphors and imagery. I really like it.

"It's cold and its bare "
the second it's needs an apostrophe too =)
~~~
I thought the rhyming was well done, but I think that you could have made the poem longer by being more specifc in your imagery. You started out really well with monsters and rain, but you slowed down near the end. I think that inserting poetic descriptions here and there would help make this poem even more unique.

Sort of reminds me of a poem I wrote called Hallways. Good work on this one.

That one was really good i read it like 2 or 3 times lol not joking. 5/5

P.S. thanks for the comment

Loved it. It had great pace and flow .

My mind is a Dungeon
It's cold and its bare
Held like a captive
all alone in this lair.

definately the best lines.
Great talent keep it up